Mike Taylor

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  • Why You’re Probably Not Hearing God’s Voice

    I’ve said this sentence a lot:

    “I feel like God is saying…” [fill in the blank].

    Take the job, leave the job, start the business, end the relationship, move cities, launch the nonprofit, etc.

    Maybe you can relate.

    What I’ve found, though, is that “I feel like God is saying…” isn’t a biblical concept.

    When I’ve said that, what I really meant was…

    “Based on what I know about God, and based on what I want, this seems right to me.”

    That is not the same thing as God speaking.

    And it’s VERY important to distinguish between the two. 

    The gap between what we think God is saying and what he’s actually saying is where a lot of frustration, confusion, and resentment toward God is born.

    Most of the time, when we think we’re hearing God tell us to do something, he probably isn’t. 

    At least, not in the way we think.

    So how does God speak based on Scripture, and how can we make sure we’re hearing the voice of God?

    Let’s look at this from a few different angles.

    When you don’t need a “word” from God

    Think about this…

    If my relationship with my dad is so close that when I walk into a situation I already know exactly what he would say, then my dad doesn’t need to say anything.

    I already know his voice in that area.

    If you’re in a situation where you’re almost certain what God would say based on Scripture and His character, then you don’t need to obsess over hearing direct instructions.

    Obsession is fear talking. 

    You already know what to do. So do it.

    If you’re in a really hard stretch in your marriage and you think God has released you from it, that is not God telling you to get divorced. Scripture is very clear that God hates divorce. (Malachi 2:16, Matthew 19:6)

    But that does not mean that no one should ever get divorced. This is where people get stuck. We want a simple YES/NO rule.

    The truth is more nuanced:

    God hates divorce, but God also understands and makes room for human weakness and real world pain (Jesus said this in Matthew 19:8).

    God hating divorce yet extending grace to people going through unbearable pain in a marriage (through infidelity, abuse, etc.) is very different from God personally telling you to get a divorce.

    But we HATE that it isn’t a black or white, YES or NO answer.

    In this in-between – where the answer is not instantly clear – is where the struggle with God is, and this is where faith and grace live.

    God saying something versus God covering something

    There is a big difference between:

    • God saying “do this”
    • God covering you when you do something imperfect

    When we make a choice that doesn’t fully match the perfect character of God, there’s mercy and grace.

    That grace is not to be abused. But we are called to love and appreciate it (Micah 6:8, 2 Corinthians 12:9). After all, that is the very heart of the gospel.

    But when I slap “God told me” on top of my imperfect decision (and all of our decisions will have imperfections due to the nature of the human heart), something dangerous happens. 

    Now I’m turning my choice into a decisive statement about God’s character.

    And when something doesn’t go the way I expect it to go, I start questioning His character.

    I start thinking, maybe God is harsh. Maybe He’s inconsistent. Maybe He set me up to fail so I would learn something.

    But in reality, I made a decision – with or without His counsel – and I labeled it as His infallible instruction, and then I judged His character by my outcome.

    This is not God’s heart for us, and it’s not even primarily how he spoke to his people in Scripture…

    How Scripture usually describes the voice of God

    If you look at how God spoke to the prophets in the Old Testament, you’ll see a phrase over and over:

    “The word of the Lord came to ___”

    It does not usually say, “God said:”

    That phrase “the word of the Lord came” carries an idea of progressive revelation found in consistent intimacy.

    In other words, over time, the prophet became aware of something that lined up with the heart and character of God. At some point they recognized it as His word.

    It arrived, unfolded, or came to them progressively.

    Yes, there are moments in Scripture where God speaks in a direct, unmistakable way. But that’s not what we see as the normal day to day experience with God in Scripture.

    Most of the time the voice of God looks less like a command and more like a growing clarity about His heart.

    God’s voice is usually like a counselor revealing truth through a journey rather than delivering answers. 

    Counselors will tell you it’s much more effective to help someone understand something for themselves and take ownership of a decision rather than simply telling them what to do.

    Isaiah describes a day when there will be a voice behind you saying, “This is the way, walk in it.” (Isaiah 30:21) He’s not in front of you like a drill sergeant leading with fear; He’s behind you while you walk by faith, not sight.

    You’re the one moving, and he’s behind you counseling you in the way you should go. It’s a submission of free will happening.

    Freedom, not spiritual paralysis

    There’s a popular Christian line that sounds very mature and goes something like this:

    “I’m not moving until God moves.”

    It sounds holy. The problem is, it’s not how Scripture describes freedom in Christ.

    This line of thinking comes at least in part from the Old Testament when God went before the people of Israel in the wilderness.

    Here’s how it’s described in the book of Exodus:

    “By day the LORD went ahead of them in a pillar of cloud to guide them on their way and by night in a pillar of fire to give them light, so that they could travel by day or night.” (Exodus 13:21)

    Later in Exodus, it says, “In all the travels of the Israelites, whenever the cloud lifted from above the tabernacle, they would set out; but if the cloud did not lift, they did not set out—until the day it lifted.” (Exodus 40:36-37)

    Here’s the problem with applying that line of thinking to us today…

    In the New Testament, the Apostle Paul said that BEFORE Jesus, God’s people were “locked up” (Galatians 3:23). He said they were like kids under a guardian, and “as long as an heir is underage, he is no different from a slave, although he owns the whole estate.” (Galatians 4:1)

    They lived by the Law and did not have freedom. He says they were slaves (Galatians 4:3).

    But then he says that when Jesus came, “God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, “Abba, Father.” So you are no longer a slave, but God’s child; and since you are his child, God has made you also an heir.”

    So post-Jesus, we are free.

    Paul says “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free.” (Galatians 5:1)

    That’s a really strange sentence if you don’t understand how God sees freedom.

    A slave has no decision-making authority. A slave waits for orders. A slave doesn’t have to wrestle with options.

    But in Christ, we’re not slaves waiting for instructions. 

    We are sons and daughters and ambassadors of Christ (2 Corinthians 5:20). Ambassadors are trusted to make decisions that represent the heart of the king. They have to think, discern, then act.

    But that doesn’t mean we have complete freedom to do whatever we want and still receive the blessing of God.

    As always, there’s nuance…

    Here’s another potentially confusing piece of Scripture:

    Paul says in his letter to the church in Corinth that, “the one who was a slave when called to faith in the Lord is the Lord’s freed person; similarly, the one who was free when called is Christ’s slave.” (1 Corinthians 7:22)

    In other words, if you came to Christ as a free person, take on the posture of a slave. Learn to willingly submit your independence to Him so your thinking can be shifted to a posture of humility and release.

    If you came to Christ without freedom, as a slave or as someone under heavy control, you now have freedom in Him. You learn to make decisions in partnership with God.

    He’s not erasing your free will in either case. He’s renewing your mind so you can use your free will to glorify Him.

    The problem with “just tell me what to do”

    The other day I was sitting next to my five year old son, Brooks, on our living room couch. He had a stack of paper and a pencil.

    He said, “Dad, what do you want me to draw?”

    “Draw whatever you want, bud.”

    “But what do you want me to draw?”

    “What do you want to draw?”

    He started getting frustrated. “I don’t know. Just tell me what to draw and I’ll draw it.”

    So I told him “Draw a dog,” and he drew a dog. As soon as he finished, he looked up again and asked, “Now what do you want me to draw?”

    Now I started getting frustrated because I realized I had created a pattern where he doesn’t get to exercise freedom and creativity.

    He never has to think about what he enjoys. He never has to take a risk. He never has to wrestle with creativity or choice. He only has to perform.

    As his dad, what brings me joy is not him mechanically doing exactly what I say to do. What brings me joy is watching him find joy in creating. 

    Even if what he makes is random and messy, the fact that it came from his heart makes me so happy. Because whatever he makes is an expression of his heart, which ultimately is an expression of my heart as his father who has helped guide and raise him.

    So instead of telling him what to draw, I started asking questions.

    “What do you enjoy? What’s your favorite toy? Where’s your favorite place?”

    His answers started to turn into ideas, and he started running with ideas rather than waiting for me to tell him what to do. And what he made made me smile.

    That’s what I believe the Father is after with us.

    His goal for us isn’t robotic obedience to a list of individualized life directions. He’s raising children who know His heart and choose to create and decide in a way that reflects Him.

    The problem with labeling something as being “from God”

    Think about what we’re really saying when we say “God told me ____”?

    We’re usually describing a mix of:

    • Thoughts
    • Emotions
    • Desires
    • Intuitions

    All of these things swirl around a situation until one direction feels overwhelmingly “right” to us.

    If you walk with God, you have His Spirit, so of course He’s going to be in that mix. He’s still counseling you and nudging you.

    But because we’re uncomfortable with uncertainty, we often turn the whole thing into a binary interaction.

    Either God said it or He did not.

    In doing so, we short circuit the wrestling process in exchange for the comfort of certainty.

    This is where idolatry sneaks in.

    The idolatry of easy answers

    In Exodus, God warns Israel about not creating idols, and he says for them to not create images. 

    An image is a visible representation of what we think something is like. It’s putting a finite boundary to something infinite.

    God made us in his image. We have boundaries, therefore we are the image – the limited representation of an infinite being.

    When we decide that God said something even though we’re uncertain about it, we’re basically saying, “If I were God, I would say to do this…”

    When we attribute our decisions to God’s voice, we’re recreating Him in our image.

    It becomes dangerously easy to try to control God’s character over time by simply changing our mind about a situation.

    But we do this for control.

    Control is at the root of all idolatry. And when we create an image (or an idol), Scripture says we “become like” the idol – unable to hear, see, speak, or feel (Psalm 115:8). We become unable to hear what God is speaking to us or experience his presence because we’re numbed by our submission to an idol.

    By trusting in something we made, we become numb to the living, breathing, active word of God (Hebrews 4:12).

    This is why it’s no light thing to say God 100% told you something. It can very quickly lead to destruction and death by misattributing God. This is the essence of blasphemy.

    God took this very seriously with prophets.

    If a prophet spoke on God’s behalf and it did not come from Him, that prophet was to be put to death. 

    Why would prophets do this, then? Well, Scripture describes these false prophets as people who speak “presumptuously.” (Deuteronomy 18:22)

    This Hebrew word for presumptuous means to be prideful and “resistant to counsel.”

    It’s fitting that the word used to describe false prophets is someone who rejects a Counselor and speaks in absolutes.

    When the Apostle Paul said, “Those who think they know something do not yet know as they ought to know.” (1 Corinthians 8:2)

    It’s also telling that the word presumption means “failing to observe the limits of what is permitted or appropriate.”

    When we say, “God told me…”, we’re often being presumptuous. We’re stepping outside of the limits God placed on us and creating an idol by attempting to put the limits of our decisions on an infinite God.

    But this does lead to an interesting question…

    Does God still speak direct instructions like he did in the Bible?

    Even in the Bible, it was a rare thing for God to speak directly to someone.

    Remember, many of the prophets’ revelations were the Word of the Lord “coming to them” – not a direct, audible speaking.

    But God did speak directly to people: Noah, Abraham, Hagar, Rebekah, Jacob, Moses, Joshua, Samuel, David, Solomon, Elijah, Job, Paul, Ananias, Peter, etc.

    But it was by no means the norm with God.

    In fact, God’s voice is described in Scripture as a precious, rare thing

    In Deuteronomy, Moses marvels at the fact that God speaks to him. He says, “Did any people ever hear the voice of God speaking out of the midst of the fire, as you have heard, and still live?”

    It was a very, VERY high privilege to hear the actual voice of God.

    Psalm 29:4 says, “The voice of the Lord is powerful; the voice of the Lord is majestic.”

    Majestic things are not common. When God speaks, it is – as it should be – a life-altering experience.

    God himself says this about how he speaks to people:

    “When there is a prophet among you, I, the Lord, reveal myself to them in visions, I speak to them in dreams. But this is not true of my servant Moses; he is faithful in all my house. With him I speak face to face, clearly and not in riddles; he sees the form of the Lord.” (Numbers 12:6-8)

    God made a point to call out the significance of his direct speaking. It’s weighty, magnificent, and rare.

    But…

    We’re told that God has always spoken, even if not directly…

    The writer of Hebrews says, “In the past God spoke to our ancestors at many times and in various ways,”

    Job 33:14 says, “God speaks in one way, and in two, yet man does not perceive it.”

    So how does God speak now primarily?

    Well, Hebrews tells us, “…but in these last days he has spoken to us by his Son.” (Hebrews 1:2)

    Jesus says this in John’s gospel:

    “But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all the truth […] he will tell you what is yet to come.” (John 16:13)

    So the Spirit will speak to us. But how?

    Jesus said, “The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit.” (John 3:8)

    This is the “gentle whisper” Elijah heard (1 Kings 19:12). This is the voice behind us saying, “this is the way” (Isaiah 30:21).

    This is the life we’re called to – being led by the Spirit. (Romans 8:14)

    Spiritual maturity is not hearing an audible order for every move.

    Maturity is:

    • Bringing your desires to God
    • Letting Scripture shape what “wise” looks like
    • Listening to the counseling of the Spirit
    • Making a choice
    • Owning that choice

    When I say “I believe this is the best decision I can make with what I know of God’s heart, and I’m asking Him to counsel me and correct me as I go,” now I’m engaged in the relationship.

    I can look back later and say, “I see where God was in this,” without accusing Him.

    I can say “I missed some things there” without crumbling.

    I can say “there was hardship and God met me in it” without assuming He caused the hardship to teach me a lesson.

    That is very different from “God, you told me to take this job, and now I hate this job, so this must be your plan.”

    Too many people falsely believe God told them to do something that ended badly so they could learn a lesson.

    Is this true? Is this God’s character?

    Let’s look at it through Scripture…

    Does God tell us to do things that end badly so we’ll learn a lesson?

    Think about Joseph.

    He has a dream from God about ruling, then he proudly tells his brothers. They hate him, throw him into a pit, sell him, and that whole chain leads to him going to Egypt, prison, and eventually leadership.

    Later, Joseph says to his brothers, “You intended this for harm, but God intended it for good.”

    Did God “intend” for Joseph to boast about his dream? No. Love is not proud, and God is love. That pride did not come from God.

    Did God abandon Joseph when he acted in immaturity? No. God walked with him through the fallout and still fulfilled His purpose.

    We often say “it must have been God’s plan” when tragedy hits. We often comfort ourselves with “God’s plan is bigger than ours.”

    But a friend dying early is not the heart of God. Death is an enemy, not a tool from God’s heart. Our broken world has real sin and real consequences.

    “God is in control” does not mean He’s control-ling. It means he’s powerful.

    Power and control are not the same thing. 

    In fact, the more powerful someone is, the less they have to control people to get their way. 

    The President has immense power yet very little direct control. The more he grabs for control, the more he loses influence.

    True power works through influence. 

    This is why God wants to renew your mind. Romans 12:2 does not say “be controlled by God so you can know His will.” It says be transformed by the renewing of your mind so you can discern His will.

    He’s not trying to turn you into a remote controlled humanoid. He is trying to grow you into a wise, free person who thinks like Him.

    Here’s what that looks like…

    If you’re deep in debt, struggling to pay bills, and convinced that “God told you” to quit your job and start a business with very little planning and no margin, you can be relatively certain that is NOT God.

    Could you still start a business? Yes. Could God be stirring up a desire for something different? Yes. Could He walk with you if you make a reckless move? Of course, because He is kind and faithful and He cares for you.

    But God’s heart is not to tell you to do something unwise so he can get glory later by bailing you out.

    God gets glory when a dad or mom lays down their need to feel important, does the quiet work of providing, creating peace at home, and slowly building something with wisdom and patience.

    God gets glory when someone stays at their job and delays gratification so their family isn’t crushed under the weight of their dream.

    That does not make the big leap stories “bad”. It just means we need to stop justifying risky decisions with “God told me”.

    There is a difference between “I want this, and I think it lines up with God’s heart, so I’m pursuing it with Him” and “God told me to do this, so if it goes badly it must be His mysterious plan.”

    The cost of getting this wrong

    When I label my decision as “God’s voice” and it later hurts me or my family, a few things happen.

    • I blame God instead of owning my part
    • I start to see God as harsh, demanding or inconsistent
    • People watching my life start to see God that way too

    If I say “God told me” and it leads to chaos in my home, unpaid bills, constant stress, and emotional whiplash for my spouse and kids, they’re going to quietly connect God with instability.

    In the Old Testament, speaking for God when He had not spoken was taken very seriously for a reason because it warped how people saw Him.

    We do something similar when we say “God told me” every time we make a move.

    Hearing God as Counselor, not taskmaster

    Jesus said the Spirit would come as an “Advocate” or “Counselor”. (John 14:26)

    A counselor does not live your life for you. A counselor:

    • Asks questions
    • Exposes motives
    • Gives wisdom
    • Offers warning
    • Encourages courage

    That is the picture Scripture gives us. We’re not standing at a vending machine tossing up prayers and waiting for an answer to drop.

    We are the people of God who wrestle with God.

    We listen for the voice behind us saying “this is the way.”

    We learn. Our mind is renewed. And over time, we start to think more and more like our Father. Our decisions are still not perfect, but they carry more of His heart.

    So what do we do with “I think God is saying…”?

    When I say, “I think God is saying…” what I mean is…

    “I’ve been in Scripture, I’ve been in prayer, and I’ve slowed down enough to see my own motives. I’ve listened to the promptings and counsel of the Holy Spirit. I’ve also talked with other believers about it. Based on all of that and what I know of God’s character up until now, I believe this is the wisest decision.”

    I have to be careful to not wholeheartedly stamp it as “God said” unless God actually did, literally, say something to me.

    I’m not making a little image of God that becomes a scapegoat for my decisions.

    I’m saying, “This is my choice, and I am making it with God as my guide.”

    In that light, I can accurately experience God as patient, kind, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love. 

    Now I see him as a Father who delights to see His kids create, decide, and walk in freedom with Him.

    So if you find yourself obsessing over “what is God telling me to do,” shift the question.

    How can I make a decision that partners with God and glorifies him?

    That will usually land you much closer to the voice of God than short-changing the relational back and forth with God.

    And it’s also much more freeing.

  • Your Impact Isn’t Limited by Your Ability, It’s Limited by Your Distractions

    Jesus is the king of paradox. 

    A paradox is when two things that appear to be opposite of one another or actually both true.

    For example, Jesus was both strong and meek at the same time. 

    He was both humble and authoritative at the same time. 

    He was both convicting and forgiving at the same time.

    But one of the biggest paradoxes from Jesus‘s earthly ministry is the picture he painted of the difference between work and rest.

    Jesus had an underlying message to everything he did, which was essentially this: love God and love people. 

    And he didn’t make them out to be two steps of a process. 

    In fact, he said that one is “like the other”. 

    What he was saying was that loving God and loving people may feel like two different things, but they’re actually all part of one process happening in our hearts.

    The tricky part that humans can mess up sometimes is that if loving people is important, then activity can start to feel like significance. 

    The more good things we do, the better we feel.

    We start to think that good works result in a closer relationship with God, therefore more work is better.

    When you consider something to be a ministry, it can feel like you’re only as significant as the size or impact of your ministry.

    But in Jesus’s ministry, he showed that the opposite is true… 

    In God’s Kingdom, you can accomplish more by doing less.

    For example, when Jesus went to Martha’s house in Luke chapter 10, we see a story of two sisters, Mary and Martha. Martha is slaving away preparing things for what must be done throughout the house as a result of having company over. 

    She wasn’t doing anything wrong. In fact, the words used in the original language of the Bible for what Martha was doing is the same word used for “service” or “ministry”. It’s interesting to note that this is one of the first mentions of this word for ministry used in the New Testament.

    But Mary, on the other hand, was doing quite the opposite. Scripture tells us that Mary was sitting at Jesus’s feet and listening. That’s it. 

    She was essentially doing what we would call chilling.

    When Martha complained to Jesus that Mary was being lazy and not helping with the service (the “ministry”), Jesus said an interesting and paradoxical thing. 

    He said that while Martha was worried about many things, there was actually only one thing she needed, and that was Jesus. 

    Mary had found that, and Jesus said that no one would take that from her.

    But wait – to serve is to love, right? And yet Mary was doing less work – less ministry – and accomplishing more in Jesus’ eyes?

    What does that mean for us today? 

    The key to answering that question is found in Luke 10:40. It says that Martha was “distracted“ by “much service”. 

    The Greek word used for “distracted” literally means to be drawn away from or dragged around. 

    Martha was being pulled away from the thing that mattered most and being dragged around in order that she wouldn’t find her way back.

    I find it interesting that God gave very simple visions to people in the Bible. 

    He kept them very simple yet very specific. 

    I think he does this so we won’t be distracted by all of the many other things that will come our way while pursuing the thing he’s put in front of us to do.

    He told Abraham that he would be a father of many nations. He didn’t say how that would happen exactly, but Abraham knew that would come through his wife because that was God’s design. Other than that, Abraham essentially had no details regarding the plan.

    Moses was told to free the Israelites from Egypt but he wasn’t told which route to take to the Promise Land. He was given a very short list of instructions. 

    If you and I were to try to plan something similar, we would probably take days, weeks, months, or even years to plan such an endeavor. But God gives him a few lines of instructions and tells him to go.

    Gideon was told he would overtake an extremely powerful enemy, but he wasn’t given a battle plan. In fact, when he raised an army, God stripped the army down to 1% of the people Gideon had prepared.

    Noah was told to build an ark and he was told how big the ark would be but he wasn’t told when it would rain, how long he had to build it, how long he would be in the boat, or any of the other million details required to build something of that magnitude.

    In story after story, God gives clear direction but he keeps his vision simple. 

    I believe he does this so we don’t get drawn away from what matters most.

    Think about Jesus…

    As he’s getting ready to ascend into heaven after the most important event in human history, he has a captive audience of loyal disciples ready to embark on the most important adventure mankind has ever known. 

    This would be the time to lay out the plan and cast the vision with lots of vivid detail including all of the various options and opportunities each of them would have to accomplish a very important mission that later became known as the Great Commission.

    But what does Jesus say to them? He says for them to do one thing: Go and make disciples of all nations.

    He could’ve laid out an intricate game plan. He could’ve talked about all of the many ways that they could go and make disciples. 

    He could’ve given them options and caveats and nuance. 

    But he didn’t. 

    Instead, he gave them a simple command that could be fulfilled through any number of their own ideas and actions as long as they all pointed to what mattered most, which was to make disciples of all nations.

    Here’s the point: your worst enemy is distraction. 

    Whenever you try to do anything meaningful, whether it’s work you’re doing at your job, raising your kids, cultivating your marriage, or doing a specific work that God has given you, you’re going to face things that attempt to draw you away from making direct progress towards the vision.

    What’s interesting is, even though Martha was the one distracted by “much service”, she was the one who opened her home to Jesus in the first place (see Luke chapter 10). 

    She had been open and receptive to Jesus, yet she had so many other things that needed to be done. And she got distracted.

    Jesus wasn’t saying to never clean the house and never prepare dinner. But he was saying that in those moments when there’s something attempting to draw us away from what matters most, we should stop and take a serious inventory of what’s most important.

    This looks like trying to find ways to make money because you’re afraid that if you jump in to what God has put in front of you he won’t provide.

    This might also look like neglecting your marriage because there are so many things to do when you have kids, a house, a job, sports, activities, social events and everything else that comes with adult life.

    We get distracted by “much service.”

    And remember, service isn’t a bad thing. 

    The same word is used in the Bible for ministry. 

    But I think it’s very interesting that the first time we see the word ministry in the New Testament, Jesus is saying to not get distracted by trying to do too much.

    So what is most important to you?

    What is the thing that if everything else had to go away it must remain no matter what in order for you to maintain a fulfilling life? 

    It’s not to say you’ll only ever do that, but everything else in your life should only be done when it leads directly to that thing being accomplished or when it leaves plenty of room for that thing to be accomplished.

    Because your impact is not limited by your ability. Your impact is limited by your distractions.

  • If You Feel Uncertain, You’re Probably On the Right Path

    When God speaks, he most often gives direction rather than instructions.

    He tells you where to go without all the details of why or how.

    He didn’t tell Adam how to tend the garden or why he had to do it. 

    He didn’t tell Noah why he was building an ark. 

    He didn’t tell Abraham where to go or why, just to go. 

    Joseph didn’t know how he would rule over his brothers or to what end. 

    Gideon, David, Peter, Paul, practically everyone in the Bible. They were given direction and not explicit instructions. In other words, there was clear direction with intentionally vague instructions.

    He does that because he gave us freedom. Scripture says it was for freedom Christ set us free.

    He gives us the incredible gift of choice, and he trusts us as his ambassadors to act on his behalf.

    If you feel uncertain, that’s the point.

    The faith required to submit your free will to him and act in accordance with his character means much more than relinquishing your responsibility in hopes that God will make the choice for you.

  • Why Your Level of Freedom Is Determined by Your Level of Personal Responsibility

    You can’t have freedom without personal responsibility.

    In fact, freedom will only increase at the rate of personal responsibility.

    From the very beginning, responsibility has been woven into life with God. 

    Adam was placed in the garden “to work it and take care of it” (Genesis 2:15). God even let Adam name the animals (Genesis 2:19–20). Considering there are millions of species in the world, I think we underestimate how big of a job God gave him (just ask a biologist).

    Moses was given the responsibility of freeing the people of Israel, and the people of Israel were given the responsibility of fighting for the Promised Land.

    Over and over again in Scripture, the pattern is always the same: freedom increases as responsibility increases.

    And Jesus talked about this in the Parable of the Talents. 

    A master entrusted three servants with his money before leaving on a journey. Two invested what they were given and doubled it. One buried it because he was afraid to lose it.

    When the master returned, he praised the first two but condemned the third as “wicked and lazy” (Matthew 25:26).

    Why? That seems harsh.

    He wasn’t condemning his ability or resources. He was condemning his rejection of the gift of responsibility.

    The prophet Ezekiel was also given a choice to accept or reject responsibility. 

    God led Ezekiel into a valley of dry bones and asked him, “Can these bones live?” 

    Of course, Ezekiel didn’t know. Only God knew that. But God told Ezekiel to speak to the bones anyway. He told him to prophesy to the bones and tell them to come to life.

    And when he obeyed, the bones came together, flesh covered them, and breath filled them (Ezekiel 37). 

    Now why did God lead Ezekiel all the way out there to have him do something that God could have done all by himself? It’s not like God needed his help.

    It’s because we can only receive the freedom God gives when we take responsibility.

    So he includes human beings in the process of redeeming creation. (2 Corinthians 5:20)

    But why does he trust us with things even when he knows we’re going to mess up?

    God desires relational intimacy because that’s his nature. Relationships can only exist where there’s freedom. Without freedom, you have nothing to give other people – no time, attention, affection, etc.

    And in order to gain freedom, you must be willing to bear the weight of responsibility. You cannot have one without the other.

    In fact, the word “responsibility” means “to respond” or the ability to respond – which is just a description of freedom.

    When we accept responsibility and carry out our free will for God’s glory, we experience the Kingdom of God here on earth.

    This is God’s heart for all people – to accept responsibility, have freedom, make wise choices, and experience life to the fullest through Him.

    This is why Colossians 3:23 says, “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters.”

    When you’re working for the Lord, you’re giving your free will to him. You’re exercising freedom to invest in your relationship because you love him.

    Not only does it bring us closer to God, but accepting the weight of responsibility is the only thing that enables you to do things with excellence.

    Think about it. Why do you clean a friend’s house more carefully than your own when we’re staying there? It’s because you feel responsible to them. 

    The same principle runs through our relationship with God, our families, our work, and the people around us. 

    What we claim responsibility for, we steward. What we refuse responsibility for, we neglect.

    If you want to see things in your life grow and thrive, it starts with accepting personal responsibility for them.

    It isn’t someone else’s fault. It isn’t someone else’s to take care of. It’s yours. You can always affect the outcome.

    And when you accept that burden, your personal freedom increases.

    When you reject that burden, you choose to remain bound inside the confines of everyone else’s actions.

    So here’s the question:

    Where are you waiting for God to move? And what responsibility has he already placed in your hands?

    In American Christianity, we love to pray for things. We love to wait on God. But most of the time, he’s waiting for you to accept responsibility and start working. 

    If you’ve been passive, it’s only a matter of time before you feel restricted.

    And it’s because passing on responsibility shrinks your freedom.

    Yes, we should pray for God to guide and open doors when we hit roadblocks.

    But I would argue most of our roadblocks are just fear dressed up as an imaginary barrier. 

    The truth is, change rarely comes by waiting. 

    Ezekiel didn’t wait for the bones to rattle on their own. 

    The servants in Jesus’ story didn’t wait for God to tell them how to multiply the money. 

    They acted based on what they knew. They took responsibility and trusted God to bless them by multiplying their efforts and giving grace where they messed up. And God worked through their obedience.

    The same is true for us. 

    God has already shown his heart through his creation, his word, and his actions in our lives. 

    Our job is to carry what he has given into the places he’s entrusted to us. The ones right in front of us.

    As we do, things begin to take shape. Dead places start to stir. Relationships begin to heal. Growth becomes possible.

    But it’s only in the movement that we often must initiate.

    Responsibility is not a burden. It’s an invitation to join God in his work – to be “co-workers in God’s service” as Paul puts it in 1 Corinthians 3:9 – so that his Kingdom can come.

    In that light, responsibility is a gift worth thanking God for every day.

  • Why It’s Normal (and Healthy) to Feel Like an Outsider If You’re Following Jesus

    To follow Jesus, we have to be willing to break what’s normal and acceptable.

    In fact, the more you follow him, the more you’ll drift outside cultural norms.

    You have to be willing to be an outlier and an outcast.

    Here’s what I mean…

    In Luke 8, a Jewish religious leader named Jairus comes to Jesus and begs him to heal his 12-year-old daughter. On the way, a crowd presses in. Jesus was already well known for healing, and large crowds often followed him.

    In that crowd was a woman who had been bleeding for 12 years with no medical hope (Luke 8:43). According to Levitical Law, she was unclean, and anyone who touched her would be unclean until evening (Leviticus 15:19). She knew this. But desperate for God, she reached out anyway and touched Jesus’ clothes. Immediately, she was healed.

    Twelve years of bleeding, healed in an instant. But she broke the law.

    Jesus stops and asks who touched him. Imagine being that woman. You’ve touched a man while unclean, experienced a miracle, and wanted to slip away quietly. The pressure and fear must have been overwhelming.

    His disciples are confused because everyone is touching him. But Jesus persists. Terrified, she comes forward, trembling, and falls at his feet. Then, in boldness, she tells her story publicly: unclean for 12 years, yet daring to believe she would be made clean instead of making him unclean.

    And Jesus doesn’t rebuke her. He blesses her: “Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace.”

    She broke the law and admitted it publicly, and Jesus blessed her anyway.

    Now imagine Jairus. As a Jewish leader, he knew the law and the scandal of what just happened. Yet he still had to decide whether to trust Jesus. On the road, he hears his daughter has died. Jesus tells him, “Don’t be afraid; just believe.”

    Think about that. Jesus stopped for a woman who was legally unclean, risked making himself unclean, and in the delay, Jairus’s daughter died. Bitterness could have set in. But Jairus proceeds anyway.

    At the house, mourners are crying. Jesus kicks them out and tells them to stop. That alone must have felt offensive. Then he takes only Peter, James, John, Jairus, and his wife. He touches the girl’s hand (again breaking the law by touching a dead body, see Numbers 19:11) and tells her to get up. And she does. And in practical fashion, Jesus tells them to give her something to eat.

    It’s easy to miss how many norms and legal standards Jesus collided with. There was a way to do things. There were rules and formalities. And Jesus navigates them with an uncomfortable amount of freedom.

    But Jesus didn’t abolish them; he fulfilled them (Matthew 5:17). He lived the heart of the law, not just the letter.

    Even our courts in America today recognize what’s called the “necessity defense”, which is breaking a law to prevent greater harm. If you break the speed limit to get someone to the hospital, you can argue that it was justified because the heart of the law is to protect lives.

    We all understand there’s a difference between the letter and the heart of the law. That comes from God, who gives us grace even though we’ve all broken his law.

    We don’t get a pass for sin, but God knows the heart. 

    One of my favorite lines is, “An ignorant yes is better than a well-informed no.” 

    If you’re pursuing God’s heart and make a mistake, good – you were pursuing him. If you break social norms or even actually laws while chasing him, grace covers you.

    Fear tells you not to do the thing you feel compelled to do. 

    Faith says if your heart is set on God, you don’t have to worry about the outcome because Jesus takes care of your life (Colossians 3:3–4; Matthew 6:33).

    Where there’s faith, there’s uncertainty. 

    And where there’s uncertainty, there’s discomfort. 

    Our comfort zones of acceptance and admiration will be challenged. But will we move forward when there’s no clear path to success?

    Jesus said if you want to follow him, you must deny yourself and take up your cross (Matthew 16:24). In his time, a cross meant shame and rejection. It was the opposite of normal. Carrying a cross implied guilt and required grace.

    Picking up your cross means dying to the law none of us can meet. But the promise is that if you give up the need to draw life from fitting in, being accepted, and being comfortable, you’ll gain true life from God (Matthew 16:25).

    And like Jairus and the bleeding woman, you’ll see things far greater than anything you imagined.

  • When Trying Your Best Isn’t Good Enough

    Effort does not equal impact.

    How many times have you heard the phrase, “I was just trying to help.” Ironically, I think that might be the least helpful thing we can say.

    But why do we feel like trying is so important? 

    Why does it feel like our efforts are validated by the effort itself?

    If I spent a week digging a hole and shoveling the dirt into a pile with no intention to do anything of value with the dirt or the hole, would my efforts for that week have been successful?

    I mean, I tried. I exerted a bunch of energy. I put forth a lot of effort. 

    But was any of it impactful?

    Here’s a fundamental truth about human nature:

    We’re okay with getting an A for effort and an F for impact.

    “Trying” is an excuse for being afraid of doing what’s truly important. 

    I will try to quit drinking if I know I’m unwilling to stop alcoholism in its tracks.

    I will try to help someone by giving them money if I’m unwilling to deal with their dysfunctional spending habits.

    I will try to get along with everyone if I’m unwilling to be honest with them about their misbeliefs and behavior.

    Striving for effort usually creates memories you can hold onto that make you feel good.

    But striving for impact creates opportunities that bring freedom to people around you.

    When your son catches the game-winning touchdown pass, it makes for a great memory because he tried hard. 

    But when he drops the game-winning touchdown pass, your compassion towards him makes for a great impact.

    When the dysfunctional family gathers once a year for Thanksgiving dinner, it makes a memory because they were just trying to be normal.

    But when you ruin Thanksgiving because you acknowledged pain and brokenness in an attempt to heal old wounds, it makes a great impact.

    When you buy Christmas for a family living in poverty, it makes for a great memory. 

    But when you serve the homeless and impoverished and teach them employable skills, it makes for a great impact.

    Great memories can be made along the way to making a great impact. But let’s not get confused about which is worth living for. 

    The generations that come after you are depending on your impact, not your effort.

  • Insecurity Causes Restlessness. Here’s How to Overcome It.

    Almost everyone is chasing something they think they lack. We all have a level of insecurity.

    Insecurity is defined as a lack of confidence or protection.

    When you feel like you’re lacking something in life (money, status, fulfillment, etc.), ask yourself…

    What have I invested in the most?

    God? Family? Comfort? Success?

    Investment = giving your:

      • time
      • attention
      • money
      • control
      • hope
      • heart
      • life
      • etc.

    That’s where your security is.

    A “security” is a financial asset. It’s something you’ve invested in.

    Abundance comes from security, not the other way around.

    If our investment security is found in anything other than God alone…we’ll always find ourselves lacking, and we’ll never have enough.

    Money won’t do it. Success won’t do it. Even family and friends can’t hold the weight of your security.

    But if we, like King David, can say to God, “you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure…” (Psalm 16:5)

    Then we, like King David, can have what David had when he said, “I lack nothing.” (Psalm 23:1)

  • How to Know If You’re Doing What God Wants You to Do

    Imagine a father and a son sitting in a living room together.

    The son is 6 years old. His head is tilted back staring at the ceiling in boredom. He has a frustrated look on his face. Finally, he lets out a big breath, looks at his father, and says, “Dad, what should I do today?“

    The dad looks at him and says, “I don’t know, son, what do you want to do?“

    The son says, “I want to do whatever you want me to do.“

    The father, confused, replies, “I want you to do what you want. I don’t want you to just do whatever I tell you to do.“

    As a father or a mother, or as a son or daughter, can you picture this situation? 

    Why would the dad be frustrated? After all, the boy only wants what his father wants.

    But the belief beneath the question that the son is asking really comes down to this: 

    “I’m afraid to choose because I don’t want to disappoint you.”

    As a father, that’s both frustrating and heartbreaking. 

    We want our kids to feel free and secure around us. 

    We don’t want them to feel like we’re over bearing or controlling. We want to be the safe place they come with their creativity and ideas and dreams.

    For a child to have such a fear-based mentality when it comes to their relationship with their father is a tragedy.

    Instead of telling a child what to do, a good father is more concerned with how they do it.

    As a dad, I don’t want to tell my kids what to do with their lives. 

    Instead, I want them to learn from me how to do whatever it is they decide to do with their lives.

    I want to teach them things like:

    • Whatever you do, do it with excellence. 
    • Love people in the same way you love yourself. 
    • Treat people with kindness. 
    • Serve other people before looking out for yourself. 

    These are the kinds of things I want my kids to think through as they do whatever it is they’re doing in life.

    To tell them what to do only fuels their propensity to avoid their freedom to choose.

    Imagine this same boy at age 18 coming to his father and asking him, “Dad, what major should I choose in college?“ Or, “Dad, what woman should I marry?“

    It seems asinine that a child would live like that.

    And yet that’s often how we approach God.

    We’re afraid to do things we’ve dreamed of doing out of fear that God won’t approve.

    Longing for the will of God becomes a mask for fear we’ve developed about the character of God.

    Fear causes us to picture God as a harsh man (Matthew 25:24). We think that if we make the wrong choice, we’ll lose his approval.

    But that’s not God’s character at all.

    God is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in love (see Exodus 34:6, Numbers 14:18, Nehemiah 9:17, Psalm 86:15, Psalm 103:8, Psalm 145:8, Joel 2:13, and Jonah 4:2).

    God is patient, merciful, and loving (see Romans 2:4, Romans 9:22, Romans 15:5, 2 Corinthians 1:3, 2 Corinthians 6:6, Galatians 5:22, Ephesians 2:4-5, Ephesians 4:2, Ephesians 4:32, Colossians 1:11, Colossians 3:12-13, 1 Timothy 1:16, Titus 3:4-5, Hebrews 4:16, James 5:11, and 2 Peter 3:9).

    I’ve spent long nights praying for God to give me the “right answer” between two good options. But I’ve almost never gotten a direct answer. 

    What I’ve found is that God will prompt me with questions and thoughts and help me filter decisions through his character.

    He often asks me what I want. (See 1 Kings 3:5, Matthew 20:21, Matthew 20:32, Mark 10:36, Mark 10:51, Luke 18:41, and John 1:38.)

    Other times he’ll wait until a desire bubbles up inside of me and I have enough courage and faith to ask Him for it. (See Genesis 15:2-6, Genesis 28:20-22, Exodus 3:7-10, 1 Samuel 1:11, 1 Samuel 1:19-20, 1 Kings 3:9-13, 2 Kings 20:2-6, Psalm 37:4, Matthew 7:7-11, John 14:13-14, John 15:7, John 16:23-24, Acts 10:30-31, and 2 Corinthians 12:8-9)

    I used to see this line of thinking as selfish – that it’s selfish to think about my desires.

    But what does a good father want? 

    A good father wants to be a part of his kids’ lives, and he wants to model for his children how to do whatever they endeavor to do in life with excellence. 

    For a child to make their own choices and act in the character of their father requires a deep intimacy, trust, and respect.

    Fear, on the other hand, has to do with punishment (1 John 4:18). But there is no condemnation for those in Christ (Romans 8:1).

    So what are you afraid of?

    Make the bold choice to exercise freedom and receive mercy (Micah 6:8).

    Then, in all your ways acknowledge him. But you have to choose a way first.

    And whatever you choose, do it with all your heart and in the full representation of God so he gets the glory. (1 Corinthians 10:31, Colossians 3:17)

    I think you’ll find that was the point all along.

  • Why You Never Feel Like You Have Enough

    The world says to take. Find what fulfills you. Go after what you want.

    And yet, despite America being one of the wealthiest countries in the world, Americans are some of the most dissatisfied people in the world.

    That’s because we’ve developed a backwards view of value.

    What you give to, lives. What you take from, dies.

    The value of bank accounts, houses, and relationships are all built on what you give, not what you take.

    What you give to increases in value.

    What you take from loses value and eventually becomes detestable to you.

    The things we hate the most are usually the things we’ve taken from the most.

    Taking says, “I need more. Why can’t you give me more?”

    Giving says, “I’m secure. I have more than enough. You are valuable to me and I’d like to invest in you.”

    Abundance comes from security. Poverty comes from insecurity.

    In finance, a “security” is a financial asset. It’s value that can be given in order to receive value back from the investment.

    You can’t receive value from something you haven’t given to, and you can’t give what you don’t already have.

    So if you find yourself lacking, the question, is, where is your security?

    If your security is found in anything other than God alone, you’ll always find yourself lacking, and you’ll never have enough.

    But if you can stop chasing the false security of comfort, achievement, and control, then you’ll find that the security you have left, in God alone, leaves you content and open-handed with the world.

    So the determining factor in whether or not you’ll be fulfilled isn’t found what you can gain but rather what you can give.

    Because what you give determines the value of your life.

  • Is God Always With You?

    What does it really mean for God to be with you?

    Scripture says that God is always present.

    Psalm 139:8 says, “If I ascend to heaven, you are there! If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there!”

    But Scripture also says multiple times that God will never leave us or forsake us.

    Jesus said in Matthew 28:20, “I am with you always, to the end of the age.”

    Hebrews 13:5 reminds us of this: ‘…God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.’” 

    This line is echoing God’s promise in Deuteronomy 31:6 to never leave or forsake his people.

    In that sense, God isn’t just present, he’s also with those who follow Jesus.

    In Isaiah 41:10, God says, “fear not, for I am with you.”

    Joshua 1:9 says, “the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

    Psalm 23:4 says, “I will fear no evil, for you are with me.”

    1 Corinthians 3:16 tells us that we are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in us. 

    Dwelling involves a conscious choice to not just be present but to also to be committed to the wellbeing of the home.

    There’s a big difference between being present with someone and being with someone.

    Being present is a matter of logistics. It involves putting yourself in the same space as someone else. God is present with everyone.

    Being with someone, on the other hand, is a matter of the heart and will. It’s a conscious choice to align with someone not just physically but also mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

    Many parents are physically present with their kids but not emotionally with them.

    Sometimes, as children of God, we can find ourselves believing the same about God:

    We know that God will never leave us in the sense that he will always be present; we’re just not sure that he’s with us.

    You can’t go anywhere God isn’t.

    But then there’s another piece of God‘s character. 

    He’s on your side, wishing and willing your good in all circumstances.

    It’s often very difficult to see God as someone who’s rooting for us to win and willing it to be so in every moment.

    Seeing that the God of the universe is truly on your side no matter how good or bad you are gives you confidence to do the good work he’s put in front of you. 

    He’s not waiting for you to get your act together. 

    He’s waiting for you to realize that he wants to call your heart his home. 

    And he knows, of course, that once you open your heart to him, then the right actions will flow from that naturally.

    When our actions start flowing from our understanding that God is actually with us and not just around us, then the goodness we’ve been chasing starts following us instead.