If I asked you, “Is your life on track right now,” would you even know how to answer?

Would you be able to tell?

We’re usually too lost in the details of our day-to-day lives to see if we’re on a course to somewhere we want to go or if we’re just going in circles.

If I walk into the woods and only stare at the ground as I walk, I’ll almost certainly end up walking in a circle.

We all need a reference point – something in the distance to show us if we’re moving in the right general direction of where we want to go.

That’s why vision is so important.

But “vision” can feel like this lofty, evasive thing that only self-help gurus have.

How can everyday, normal people tell if their lives are on track or not?

What would future you say?

There’s a simple question you can ask yourself to see if you’re on track:

If I could go ten years into the future and talk to the person I’ll become, what would future me say?

The greatest mentor you’ll ever have is the future version of yourself.

That question has the power to change your behavior because it pulls you out of short-term problem solving and into long-term building mode.

We spend too much time avoiding things rather than building things.

Avoidance leads us in circles, not making progress towards a destination.

We love to ask:

“If you could go back in time, what would you change?”

The problem is, it’s a regret-based approach. 

It’s a gentler way of asking, “What do you want to avoid in the future?”

Fear and shame can certainly inform, but they rarely produce meaningful change.

Imagining a conversation with your future self, on the other hand, shifts the focus from avoiding mistakes to aligning with an identity as a certain type of person – the person you want to become.

Only identity drives meaningful action.

Let me show you why this is true…

Another question we like to ask is, “Where do you want to be in ten years?”

But the answer to that question almost never changes people’s behavior. I’ve tried to chase down the answer to that question so many times it makes my head spin to think about it.

Why is it so frustrating to figure out where we want to be 10 years from now?

It’s because looking at where you want to go puts the focus on what you want to achieve, not who you need to become.

When you’re not making decisions from who you are and who you’re becoming, achievement goals have no value and only discourage you.

Even worse, achievement goals create friction in our minds between who we are and who we want to be.

“I’m not here and I want to be. Okay, how do I get there?”

And we start down the road of listing things we need to do until we’re overwhelmed.

This leads to what’s called cognitive dissonance.

Cognitive dissonance is the mental tension we experience when we hold conflicting beliefs or when our behavior contradicts our values. 

This discomfort can motivate us to change, but it often just causes frustration and withdrawal.

Because your current identity doesn’t line up with the one you imagine, the distance becomes discouraging instead of motivating.

But when you look ahead and imagine yourself at a future state, something shifts.

How to stop being overwhelmed by goals

Most goal-setting exercises create cognitive dissonance – friction in our minds between who we are and where we want to be.

But here’s why letting the “future you” mentor “today you” keeps you from getting overwhelmed and actually leads to change…

The “you in 10 years” is not imaginary. You will be that person, successful or unsuccessful, wise or unwise, better or worse. You will become someone.

So ask the real person you’re becoming for help. That kills cognitive dissonance.

Whether future you is successful or unsuccessful, the advice will remain the same.

And if that feels difficult, flip it around and look ten years back.

How would you coach the younger version of you?

Forget about what you would change. Just coach yourself.

• Maybe you would tell yourself to stop chasing things. 
• Maybe you would tell yourself that it’s perfectly fine to be frustrated with where you’re at right now.
• Maybe you would say to give yourself grace.

But maybe you would also say to look beyond quick fixes and start investing in the thing you care about now.

Do you see how freeing it is when you take the perspective of a mentor?

You’re not drowning in a sea of to-dos. Instead, you’re able to give yourself compassion, but you’re also able to motivate yourself through the lens of who you know yourself to be deep down beneath all the distractions.

But the bigger thing that happens when you mentor yourself like this is:

This exercise helps you uncover what you actually value.

Cognitive dissonance occurs when our actions don’t line up with our values.

When you do things based on your values, you’re much more likely to follow through.

Your values are at the core of what matters most to you. They’re central to your identity.

That’s why identity produces lasting change – because it drives values-based decisions.

Values are another one of those squishy personal development terms that most people pretend to understand but almost never have identified.

You may not be able to list your values if someone were to ask you, but we all have values.

They’re usually just buried beneath all the other motives and responsibilities and distractions.

But you have values. And your values very rarely change.

They might shift over time, but they’re deeply ingrained into who you are as a person.

Whatever you would coach yourself to do 10 years ago is probably very similar to what you would coach yourself to do 10 years from now.

Why is that?

Because you’re uncovering your values. It just takes a little digging to see.

I believe these values are so consistent because they’ve been given to each of us by God.

God made you to care about certain things more than others, and when you have that strong “why” behind your choices, it’s almost like having a super-charged willpower.

But the opposite is also true…

Living outside of your values leads to internal conflict and inconsistency.

When your life moves outside your values, you feel it.

This is when cognitive dissonance starts, and it causes procrastination, inconsistencies, and feeling like you’re stuck going in circles.

Like a horse with its head staring at the ground, you’ll:

• be very hesitant to move
• sporadically change directions towards wherever feels right in the moment
• not go very fast wherever it is you’re going
• end up going in circles if you wander long enough

It’s because you’re stuck between who you are now and who you think you should be. So you revert to short-term thinking.

Here’s what I’ve learned:

There are times when you need short-term thinking.

Sometimes you just need to do what you need to do to pay bills, get through a tough time, etc.

But that time has a purpose. It’s not meant to become your identity, and it shouldn’t distract you from your values.

The ruthless elimination of distraction

When the nation of Israel returned from 70 years of exile in Babylon, they one of the first things they did was they started rebuilding the temple in Jerusalem.

The temple represented the presence of God and the ultimate strength for their nation. It represented their values.

But during the rebuilding project, they stopped construction because of the opposition they were getting from surrounding nations.

When they stopped building what they valued, they drifted from what they valued and got hyper-focused on their own worlds.

They started building their own homes, their own lives, and they forgot about what they really valued – God’s presence.

So God sent a prophet who essentially told them that they had lost their focus.

“Is it a time for you yourselves to be living in your paneled houses, while this house [God’s house] remains in ruin?”

Haggai 1:4

The warning for us is to maintain an eternal perspective – one that’s based on values and not short-term needs and distractions.

The greatest threat to the work God wants to do through you is distraction.

Distraction thrives on short term thinking. It feels urgent even when it’s not important.

That’s why zooming out matters so much.

If a decision only impacts the next year or two of your life, it’s probably a distraction.

If it shapes the next decade, it’s probably meaningful.

And if 10-year-older you would co-sign on it, it’s definitely meaningful.

So sit down across from your future self and ask:

• What would you say to stop doing?
• What would you say to start?
• What would matter to you?
• What would you beg yourself not to waste?

The answer will come from your values.

And living a values-based life will lead to greater impact, less chaos, and more influence than you can imagine.